Changed for Good

Since the girls were dressing up as Elphaba and Glinda for Halloween, they've wanted to listen to the "Wicked" soundtrack in the car as we've been driving to and fro. It is such a great musical with so many wise insights into life (I still think that "Into the Woods" might have it beat, but that's another post entirely).

As we've been listening, I've really been struck by the song near the end "Changed for Good".
It applies to all sorts of situations, I'm sure, but like most things, it has got me thinking about motherhood.These people, our children, come into our lives with so much personality and so many facets of our (their parents') personalities already defining who they are. We have to learn to interact with each of them uniquely. Comingled with their sweet fragility, their determination to learn, and their generous stubborn streaks, I see myself over and over again. Ironically the things that I find most difficult in them are the same traits I find difficult in myself. It well may be that in trying to help my daughters, I may be able to learn to help myself in the areas I struggle with.It makes me wonder if we aren't sent children whose personalities will bring us into exactly the situations we need to grow. There is this concept in the church (we hear about it a lot in family history contexts) of mutual salvation -- they without us cannot be saved and neither we without them. I don't know that I've ever really applied it to the everyday of family interactions though.As I travel this path of loving and leading these three infuriating and darling girls, it is tempting to bemoan how much my life has been changed. There are so many things that seem limiting in the life of a mother -- so many times that you have to choose the needs of these little cretins over whatever other thing you might feel like doing. Until you remember that this path was a choice. While most people probably don't think in great detail about how much parethood rocks your world off its foundations before commiting to it, I think most do know in the abstract that there will be challenges and sacrifices and that through it all, not only will you have the staggering privilege of shaping the life of a child, but you will also experience tremendous growth yourself.I hope that the everyday choices I make as a mother are leading me to be changed for the better. I hope that my interactions with the girls will be motivated and guided by love. I think that is the way to make sure that we aren't just changed forever, but changed for the better.