Energizer Bunny

I wonder why it is that I have to continually relearn the same lessons over and over again?

This week I have been really energized about cooking good food. I've tried three new recipes and made something "real" every night (if you count the store-bought ravioli with homemade sauce we did on Monday). It feels great to eat well. I love the positive feedback and love feeling in control. This kitchen energy has been accompanied by a desire to clean my house and the main floor actually doesn't look bad. A 10-minute cleanup and it could be company ready. The upstairs is another story of course --the kids clothes are just not something I've chosen to handle yet and so they're overwhelming. I ought to put away right after washing, but I somehow think it will be easier to wait until all the week's laundry is done to sort and by then putting away is a huge project. Then there's the basement of course. Allen has started calling it the pit of despair. Maybe I'll find some great ideas at the Ikea opening tomorrow that will make cleaning the basement fun too. What we really ought to do is make up some boxes for kids in Iraq.

Anyway, the point of the post is that when I'm doing the things at home and with the kids that I know I ought to be, I fell better. I am more interested in doing other things, and feel in control and therefore able to handle the chaos and whining better. I love C. Terry Warner's book Bonds that Make Us Free which talks about the self deceptions we use to justify our feelings and how often they lead us to unhappiness and strained relationships. So why can't I stop the cycle of deceiving myself into thinking that I am somehow oppressed or a victim and just enjoy the actually really awesome life that I have. When I feel like this, I love the world. I like the way it feels. I choose happy.